“Examine the labels you’ve given yourself. Each label is a line or boundary that you don’t allow yourself to cross. ~Wayne Dyer
Living with ADHD and anxiety can feel like trying to navigate life with your mind running in a thousand directions at once. It’s frustrating and exhausting, and sometimes, success feels just out of reach.
But the truth is: success is possible. Even if it feels like your brain is working against you, with the right strategies and support, you can thrive.
As a nurse practitioner who has had undiagnosed ADHD and anxiety most of my life, I have experienced the struggles that come with both. I was labeled lazy, unteachable, and a failure.
But I also learned how to break through those labels and succeed on my own terms. It’s not easy, but it’s definitely achievable.
The Early Years: ADHD and School Anxiety
Growing up, ADHD wasn’t something people talked about. Children who have trouble paying attention are often seen as lazy or troublemakers. I’m one of them, but I’m not the hyperactive type, so my struggles go unnoticed.
My teacher thought I didn’t work hard enough, but the truth is, I tried my best. If a subject doesn’t interest me, my brain can’t focus.
The frustration of not being able to retain information or pay attention makes school extremely difficult. Teachers labeled me lazy or unteachable, and those labels stuck to me. By the time I got to high school, I was so far behind that I saw no point in going to class.
My results were announced to everyone, and I was at the bottom every time. It feels like the world is constantly reminding me that I am a failure.
As my anxiety increased, I began skipping class regularly. Why show up just to feel judged? I was already seen as a kid who couldn’t keep up, and every time I walked into a classroom it felt like a reminder of how far behind I was.
The anxiety of being judged, combined with my ADHD, made it impossible for me to succeed in that environment.
hit rock bottom
Without a support system in place and a constant feeling of failure hanging over me, I turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Drugs and alcohol became my escape from stress, anxiety, and feelings of powerlessness.
The constant emotional onslaught from teachers, peers, and my own inner voice was too much to bear.
I started to believe that I really was a failure. No one seemed to care about my potential and I certainly didn’t see it myself. Eventually, I was expelled from public high school. At the time, this seemed like the end of the road to me, but in reality, it was the best thing that could have happened.
Finding a New Path: Alternative Schools
After being kicked out of public high school, I was sent to an alternative school, a place for the so-called “bad kids.” The school is known for its outflow of rejects—those who are expected to drop out, end up in jail, or become pregnant.
But what I didn’t expect was how this environment would change my life.
At the alternative school, the teachers didn’t care about my past failures. They didn’t look down on me because of my low grades, nor did they judge me for falling behind. Instead, they saw potential in me. They work with me one-on-one and provide me with opportunities to catch up and even make progress. For the first time in my life I felt like someone believed in me.
One teacher in particular recognized my writing talent and encouraged me to join the school newsletter. I started taking on more responsibilities and eventually became an editor. For the first time, I began to think of myself as capable and intelligent.
College vs. Career: Succeeding Despite ADHD and Anxiety
After graduating from an alternative high school, I gained a newfound confidence. For the first time, I believed college might be an option for me. I started at a community college and eventually transferred to a university where I earned a bachelor’s degree in journalism and communication studies.
However, after working in journalism for a while, I realized that it wasn’t really my passion. I pivoted and went back to school to pursue a career in nursing. Earning an associate degree in nursing was one of the hardest things I have ever done, but also the most rewarding.
I worked in the emergency room for seven years, and the fast-paced environment kept my ADHD under control, while the fragility of life was a constant reminder that put my anxiety in perspective.
Managing ADHD and Anxiety in Adulthood
Although I was successful in my career, my ADHD and anxiety didn’t magically go away. In fact, they became even more noticeable when I transitioned into a career as a licensed nurse practitioner.
The COVID-19 pandemic has caused me tremendous stress and my anxiety has skyrocketed. I found myself overthinking every decision, double-checking my work, and constantly seeking reassurance from my colleagues.
It was clear that I needed to develop better strategies for managing my ADHD and anxiety. Through a combination of medication, mindfulness practices, and a strong support system, I have been able to get both under control.
What Works for Me: Strategies for Managing ADHD and Anxiety
Over the years, I have discovered that managing ADHD and anxiety requires a holistic approach. Medication is a helpful tool, but it’s not the only answer. I also incorporate practices like meditation, gratitude, and positive emotions into my daily life, all of which help me manage my symptoms.
Meditation in particular is a game changer. It helps me calm my mind and stay grounded, especially when my anxiety starts to creep in.
Positivity is another important tool in my toolbox. I’ve learned that staying positive isn’t about pretending everything is perfect, but choosing to focus on the things that are going well and use that as motivation to keep going.
Believe in the importance of yourself
Looking back, I realize that one of the biggest turning points in my life was learning to trust myself. For too long, I have internalized the labels others have placed on me. But once I started seeing my potential and believing in my ability to succeed, everything changed.
ADHD and anxiety do not define who you are or what you can achieve. Yes, they are challenges, but they are also part of what makes you special.
With the right tools, strategies, and mindset, you can turn these challenges into an advantage.
Final Thoughts: Success is possible – keep moving forward
ADHD and anxiety can sometimes feel like insurmountable obstacles, but they don’t have to hold you back. Success is possible, even if it feels out of reach right now.
You may feel like you’re failing, but you’re not. You are capable of much more than you think.
It doesn’t matter where you start or what label you are given. What matters is that you keep moving forward, believe in your potential, and surround yourself with people who support and lift you up.
Whatever difficulties you face, they are part of your story, not the end of it.
keep going. Success is within reach.
About Melissa McNamara
Melissa McNamara, Founder Happiness is easierdedicated to showing that happiness is possible for everyone. Her blog shares practical, fact-based tips and tricks for living a healthier, more fulfilling life. As a nurse practitioner, Melissa combines her healthcare expertise with clear, actionable advice. Despite early challenges, she turned them into opportunities for growth and through Happiness is easiershe provides the tools to help others achieve lasting happiness.
