“Some people are empowered by travel, some are inspired by the warmth of home. Some thrive in the spotlight, some feel a responsibility to support those on stage. Some like to dress half-naked and curse like sailors, while Some prefer humility and gentleness. The truth is: we are all empowered and inspired in different ways, and it is not our responsibility to dictate what happens to others ~ Brooke Hampton.
In 1992, the Olympics began, and my dad was glued to the screen. He asked me to come over and watch it with him, and although I didn’t know it at the time, that moment would change my life.
I remember seeing a woman dancing to music in the pool, her movements effortlessly moving in and out of the water. This is synchronized swimming and it is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I couldn’t look away. Her presence, the grace and joy in her movements stirred something deep within me. At that moment, I knew I had to try it myself.
Swimming became my world. It brings me a joy I didn’t know I had – a feeling of being connected to something outside of myself, yet feeling whole inside. I found a part of myself in that water, and it became a constant source of satisfaction over the years.
However, when I reached a certain skill level, I found myself at a crossroads. I was eighteen years old and faced a choice: should I continue swimming at an elite level, or take a “normal” path, go to college and pursue a “real” career like everyone else? Society made it clear which path was possible and expected, and I felt an unspoken pressure to conform.
In the end, I chose the “safe” option. I gave up swimming and studied to be a registered nurse. For a while, I was proud of my decision. Nursing is a fulfilling job, and I am viewed by others as a person with a purpose, even a “hero.” I had stability, respect, and everything I thought I should want.
But there was something else there—a quiet emptiness that I couldn’t ignore. It’s a painful feeling, like I’ve left a part of myself behind that I can’t take back. Despite the appreciation I received as a nurse, I still had one deep and lingering question: Is that all?
To fill this gap, I decided to try something completely different. I started doing aerial arts training just for fun. But soon, “just for fun” turned into something more. Aerial art opened up a closed off part of me—a part of me that felt completely alive. The more I trained, the more I realized I really wanted this. My passion was strong enough that in my thirties I was offered a contract as a professional circus performer.
For the first time since swimming, I felt whole. But with the emergence of this new identity, it also brings new judgments and questions. I was no longer seen as a nurse with a “real” career, but rather as a dreamer. People couldn’t understand why I quit a stable job and made retirement plans to fly in silks. I started questioning my purpose again!
Then, one day, I noticed something powerful. I was used to the joy on the faces of the children in the audience, but when I looked closer, I saw the same spark of joy in the eyes of the adults. I realized I was offering something important, something they didn’t often experience. I give them some time to experience wonder and escape the stress of everyday life.
In that moment, I saw my purpose clearly – I’m here to bring joy to the kids and to everyone watching.
A few years later, I got married, had two beautiful children, and was happier than I had ever been. But as I adjusted to my new life, I found myself struggling with the same emptiness again, although now it was tinged with guilt. I have a lot to be grateful for – a loving family, two wonderful kids. How come I feel like this? I was thousands of miles away from my family and community, exhausted, and trying to overcome the challenges of motherhood. I know I’ve lost myself again. I can feel it.
My husband noticed my heaviness, and one day he brought me a gift: a set of paintbrushes and a blank canvas. He encouraged me to try something new and see if it would help me reconnect with myself. I had never painted since I was a child, and I didn’t know if it was useful, but I picked up a paintbrush anyway. This small gesture rekindled something deep inside me that I thought was gone. I felt excited, inspired, and awake for the first time in years.
Drawing became my new way of following my joy, and I felt my purpose deepen when I created art. I’m bringing beauty into the world and creating pieces that I can share that might spark joy in someone else. Art allows me to process my emotions and express my inner world, which makes me feel whole again.
Looking back on this journey, I realize that joy has always been my compass. Life can take us down unexpected paths, and sometimes society’s expectations can lead us away from our true calling. But when we listen to our inner voice, and when we follow what brings us joy, we can find a direction that feels right—even if it doesn’t make sense to others.
Here are some insights I’ve gleaned along the way:
Joy can be a powerful guide.
If we let nature take its course, joy can tell us where to go, even if the path isn’t clear. It’s worth listening to that pull and letting it be our compass.
Embracing change can bring a sense of accomplishment.
Choosing happiness often means stepping into the unknown. It may mean giving up on the “real” and taking risks on things that are uncertain. But every change brings me closer to the person I’m meant to be.
The journey of life sometimes comes full circle.
I started with swimming, returned to acting in a new way, and finally found a place in the arts. Sometimes joy takes us back to things we once loved but have left behind. When we accept this, we open ourselves to growth and fulfillment.
Looking back, I am grateful that I had the courage to continue listening to my intuition. It took me through nursing, aerial performance, and ultimately to the canvas, each step revealing more about who I am. I’ve learned that when we allow ourselves to pursue happiness—no matter what that looks like—we get closer to the life we’re meant to live.
About Josie Anne Sakura
Josie.Ane Sakura is an artist and certified yoga teacher who uses her paintings to bring beauty and joy to the world. Combining art and wellness is very important to her as she believes creativity and healing are intertwined. Connect with Josie at heartsyourlife.com.
